- Breaker of swords
- Legally required to be covered at all times as it makes all who see it swoon
- Should be classified as a rigid parry object
- More manly than Kenric's Manly Beard
- The reason traffic in Massachusetts is so bad
- Caused the Red Sox to postpone their opening day
- It makes Davius St. Jacques cry on sight.
- They even humble Master Avery Shaw